Narcissism on the Rise
Narcissism has been on the rise for years, with extra individuals discussing it and social media seemingly contributing to its progress. Diagnoses are rising, and narcissistic tendencies inside our tradition have gotten extra pronounced. At its most elementary degree, narcissism is an extreme concentrate on oneself. Whereas “extreme” could also be open to interpretation and cultural sensitivities, it’s clear to these of us within the church and the counseling room that conversations about narcissism have gotten extra frequent. Readers could even be capable to record people of their lives who may readily be described as narcissistic.
Connecting Narcissism to Biblical Terminology
For all the eye on narcissism and narcissistic character dysfunction in our present tradition, it’s easy to see how the problem pertains to biblical rules. Narcissism is however a half-step away from the idea of satisfaction. Extra jarringly, it’s an idolization of oneself. That is the place we are going to focus our consideration. Narcissism is, fairly merely, idolatry. As a substitute of worshipping the God of the universe, narcissists make themselves the god of their very own universe, making a actuality centered solely on them.
Narcissism and Idolatry
For individuals who have a narcissist of their lives, attempt making use of this paradigm of idolatry and see the way it suits. It supplies a biblical lens by way of which to view all of the narcissist’s behaviors. For the sake of illustration, we are going to check with the narcissistic particular person utilizing masculine pronouns, however ladies can clearly battle with this degree of self-idolatry, too. Nonetheless, for our current functions, “he” will suffice.
Idolatry of self says, “I’m god. All ought to worship me.” The narcissist navigates life as if he’s all the time proper. He would by no means admit it outright, however that is how he lives. In any case, everybody should serve god, and so long as individuals serve him, all is effectively. When individuals refuse to serve this “god,” he feels the necessity to instill worry in those that don’t undergo his needs—although this intimidation could manifest in varied methods. For this reason narcissism and abuse so usually go hand in hand. These demonstrations of superiority are meant to make sure that these beneath his affect proceed to serve him.
Worship Practices
The narcissist’s complete world revolves round him. He dedicates his time and vitality to doting on himself, in search of to completely love and worship himself. He needs others to do the identical—to see the error of their methods, repent, and dote on him. He buys what he needs, when he needs, and as a lot as he needs as a result of he’s god and should get every thing precisely proper in serving himself. He expects the identical from others: they need to love and serve him.
He modifies plans with out regard for the way it impacts others, and the one irritation he feels is when somebody dares to query his will. He redoes duties others have executed as a result of he believes he does them higher. He should undermine anybody who may compete with or problem his divinity, and he expects affirmation and reward, as “god” deserves such therapy. He reorganizes the home with out concern for others’ preferences as a result of he believes he all the time is aware of finest. He has a set of spoken and unstated guidelines that kind the “ten commandments” of his life. If others obey his legal guidelines, all is effectively. If not, he could really feel the necessity to reinstate the worry of god.
He sees how others do issues and is definite he does them higher. He grows annoyed with others’ habits, feeling burdened by their lack of ability to get issues precisely proper in service to him. Finally, he seeks to style a world the place every thing is as he wishes, so long as others don’t mess it up.
The Best Want
The idolatry described above reveals what occurs when a coronary heart is permitted to like itself with little restraint. It’s a image of Isaiah’s exposé of idolatry in 44:9-20, merely turned in on itself. Tragically, within the case of the narcissist or narcissistic abuser, this idolatry usually signifies that we’re coping with a pre-converted individual. An individual can’t serve the one true and dwelling God whereas concurrently believing, “I’m god.” These two realities are virtually all the time mutually unique. So long as the narcissist believes that god is himself and expects everybody to acknowledge this, any lasting change will sadly not happen. Moreover, complying with the narcissist’s whims and strolling on eggshells to please him is not going to result in a peaceable or blessed life. What is required is a whole transformation of the narcissist’s coronary heart and worldview. He should substitute his self-idolatry with true worship of the dwelling God.
He is not going to serve the Lord or love others (Matt. 22:37-40) as Christ instructions till he relinquishes his self-deification. For these dwelling with or round a narcissist, whereas there are methods to attenuate hurt, the best want is the transformation of the narcissist’s coronary heart—not a change in the way you relate to him. By the Lord’s grace, the true God has been recognized to vary self-worshipping individuals at the least a time or two: take into account Manasseh (2 Chron. 33:10-16) and the Apostle Paul (Acts 9:1-19) as examples. Whereas the state of affairs with narcissism could really feel dire, and infrequently could be, Christ’s arm isn’t too weak to avoid wasting the self-idolater from himself.
Questions for Reflection
- Contemplating this notion of self-idolatry, how may such a perspective alter the counsel given to these within the narcissist’s life?
- If a whole worldview shift and coronary heart change are wanted, how does this modify our posture in attempting to assist the narcissist see and observe the best way they’re dwelling and treating others?
- How does this biblical analysis of idolatry help us in addressing the guts points at play in those that would in any other case be recognized with “narcissistic character dysfunction”?
