HomeCounselingBiblical Counseling Coalition | Consolation in Life’s Disappointments

Biblical Counseling Coalition | Consolation in Life’s Disappointments


Disappointment. We’ve all been there. There’s one thing we actually need, and for some motive, it doesn’t come to go. Counselees could are available very disillusioned and discouraged. How can we assist?

Once we anticipate circumstances to go a sure method, after we anticipate individuals to do sure issues, after we anticipate God to reply our prayers the way in which we expect could be greatest, after which our expectations should not realized, disappointment grips our hearts.

It’s good to know that feeling disillusioned just isn’t essentially a sin. How we reply to disappointment is what’s essential.

Disappointments are available all styles and sizes. There are completely different ranges of disappointment. The frustration we really feel when our favourite crew loses is a complete lot completely different from the frustration we really feel when deserted by a liked one.

Our disappointments could final solely a short while or could persist a lifetime. Some disappointments can affect a lot of our lives and the way we reply to additional disappointments.

Disappointments We Expertise

We undergo disappointments in numerous methods. Listed here are just some:

  • A failed marriage or a proposal that by no means got here
  • Dying of a partner or a baby
  • Infertility
  • Sexual abuse by the hands of somebody who was trusted
  • Failing well being or a devastating analysis
  • Kids who stroll away from the religion
  • Betrayal by individuals who ought to have been reliable

Why We Expertise Disappointments

Though the Bible tells us that struggling is part of life this aspect of heaven, it nonetheless takes us without warning, and it hurts. But the Scriptures clarify that struggling on earth is to be anticipated.

I believe we’ve all dreamed of a “fortunately ever after.” Not all expectations are unhealthy. However disappointments can get the perfect of us after we put an excessive amount of or all of our hope in one thing or somebody apart from God and His plan for us. Once we undergo disappointments, whether or not small or life-altering, our hearts are revealed.

All of us have expectations of:

  • Ourselves—that we’re extra succesful, extra self-sufficient, extra intelligent, wiser, extra devoted, and stronger than we actually are.
  • Others—that they may cooperate with our wishes. We anticipate others to return by for us and never allow us to down.
  • God—we expect that if we do our half, God will do His half and bless us and provides us lives that make sense to us. We would like solutions to our prayers in keeping with our knowledge and wishes.

However actually, we’re frail. Individuals allow us to down. And God isn’t a genie in a bottle to satisfy our each want and prayer. That is actuality! Now we have an phantasm that we will management what goes on in our lives, however the fact is that we dwell in a world the place we’ll undergo disappointments and heartaches.

The disappointments we undergo are a part of the method God makes use of to adapt us to the likeness of Jesus Christ and assist us develop perseverance and an everlasting perspective of life. For instance, consider the disappointments that have been a part of the method God used to organize Joseph to be second in command in Egypt. But Joseph might say with integrity to his brothers, “You meant to hurt me, however God meant it for good to perform what’s now being achieved, the saving of many lives” (Gen. 50:20).

Ste Casey has properly written:

“So a lot of my prayers are pleas that the Lord would ship me from the method. ‘Lord, give me reduction from this factor you’re doing in my life! Change this now!’ But the method is the entire level.”[1]

The method is the entire level!

Take into consideration the query Devil requested God: “Does Job serve God for nothing?” (Job 1:9). Will we serve God for what we hope to get from Him, or can we serve God due to who He’s? Is God worthy of our worship even when life on this aspect of heaven has disappointments?

Like Job, we could not get all of the solutions we want. How will we assist our counselees deal with life’s disappointments once they desperately need reduction and solutions?

Study What We Consider

On this life, we’ll face issues we will’t perceive and circumstances that may take a look at our religion to the core. If we hope to glorify God in our disappointments and glean all the teachings He has for us in them, we should study what we imagine about God to see if it matches up with Scripture.

To navigate our disappointments nicely, we should begin with the right premise: now we have to know and develop in our understanding of God and His windfall. God is doing good work in every of our disappointments. We could not at all times know or perceive what He’s doing, however we will belief Him and discover consolation in figuring out He’s good and sovereign. We should assist our counselees develop an even bigger and higher understanding of what God is doing within the lives of every of His youngsters. 

“Ache and disappointment have the power to slender our gaze and shrink our world to the scale of what’s bothering or interrupting us probably the most. In our weak spot, we’re blinded to something apart from reduction. Fixing what’s unsuitable so dominates our considering that we’re susceptible to miss what’s proper in entrance of us, particularly the customarily intangible realities of the always-present grace of God. It’s in him that we dwell and transfer and have our being (Acts 17:28). He’s the largest participant in any given second, but he drops out of our spectrum of imaginative and prescient. This isn’t to reduce the length or depth of your wrestle however merely to level out that when our bandwidth is jammed up with merely getting by the day, it may be tough to see the larger story that may really assist us get by the day.”[2]

Truths and Consolation Revealed in Scripture

Our counselees ought to discover consolation in who God is as revealed within the Bible and develop a robust biblical basis in order that they gained’t be crushed by the disappointments they undergo.

  • The Lord by no means adjustments (Mal. 3:6a).
  • The Lord is smart (Jer. 10:12).
  • The Lord is nice (Ps. 119:69).
  • The Lord is gracious (Ps. 116:5-6).
  • The Lord is highly effective (2 Pet. 1:3).
  • The Lord is compassionate (Ps. 145:8-9).
  • The Lord is devoted (Ps. 33:4).

God’s Functions and Advantages in Disappointments

Our struggling is proscribed and is designed by a sovereign, all-wise, and loving God for His divine and good functions and for our everlasting profit. God doesn’t permit us to undergo disappointments haphazardly. Consider these advantages:

  • We’re being conformed to the likeness of Christ (Rom. 8:28-29).
  • We will deliver glory to God (1 Cor. 10:31).
  • We be taught obedience (Ps. 119:71).
  • Our religion is being purified and confirmed real (1 Pet. 1:6-7).
  • We develop in religious maturity (James 1:2-4).
  • We develop in holiness, righteousness, and peace (Heb. 12:10-11).
  • We be taught to treasure the Lord somewhat than this world (Matt. 6:21).
  • We be taught to seek out true consolation in God (2 Cor. 1:3-11).
  • We develop in hope (Rom. 5:1-5).
  • We’re being ready for fruitful ministry (John 12:24).

As followers of Christ, we would like the advantages, however we resist the method. As we persevere by trials and disappointments, we’ll discover that the advantages far outweigh the ache.

Despite the fact that disappointments are laborious and typically life-changing, we will select to imagine by religion {that a} good and sensible God has the very best in thoughts for His youngsters. We don’t need to waste the alternatives God provides us to know Him on a deeper stage, treasure Him extra, and develop in our love for Him. We will select to belief God even when we don’t perceive. God at all times has the perfect in thoughts for His youngsters. Even, and possibly particularly, in disappointments.

Questions for Reflection

  1. How do you sometimes reply to disappointments?
  2. How does your considering want to alter concerning disappointments?
  3. What would possibly the Lord be instructing you in your disappointments?

[1] Ste Casey, I Prayed and Nothing Modified (Greensboro, NC: New Progress Press, 2024), 14.

[2] Ibid., 7.