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Biblical Counseling Coalition | Participating Sorrow In response to Ecclesiastes


What includes a biblical view of sorrow? Maybe a number of the Scriptures that come to thoughts in soul care ministry are Paul’s references to worldly and godly sorrow in 2 Corinthians 7. There, he speaks of a guilt-induced heaviness of the center that stems from sin and is remedied by repentance. However what occurs when our understanding of sorrow is proscribed to this passage—after we solely see sorrow in connection to non-public sin? Is repentance at all times the treatment for disappointment? Is the aim of biblical counseling to make individuals impervious to grief?

Smart counsel takes the entire Phrase of God under consideration when participating in whole-person care.

Whereas Paul’s distinction between worldly and godly sorrow is crucial, the Scriptures converse extra broadly to the perform of sorrow in a fallen world. Maybe probably the most under-appreciated insights about this “affliction of exile” are discovered within the guide of Ecclesiastes. There, sorrow isn’t narrowly considered as a consequence of private sin, however as a consequence of the curse suffered by the righteous and depraved alike. This has essential ramifications for discipleship. If we consider sorrow purely as one thing to be resisted or repented of, we steal our counsele’s alternative to develop in knowledge and gospel pleasure (Eccles. 7:2-4).

Whereas we don’t need to counsel sorrow to the exclusion of ethical accountability, we additionally don’t need to downplay unavoidable struggling or the needs of windfall. In my ministry, I’ve seen hope restored as views on sorrow are enlarged to incorporate a theology of struggling—a framework that’s unafraid to acknowledge the “sad enterprise” (Eccles. 1:13) of life. Ecclesiastes helps us to construct such a theology. It presents a redemptive perspective on sorrow in addition to counsel for participating it correctly.

Sorrow as a Symptom

In Ecclesiastes, we see sorrow offered as a symptom of post-fall life. Earlier than the curse, creation thrived and functioned the best way God meant: Adam knew nothing of sorrow, and Eve nothing of ache. However when their disobedience within the backyard introduced these overseas experiences upon them (and subsequently, upon us), flourishing grew to become an train in futility (Gen. 3:16-19; Eccles. 2:22-23). Beneath the curse, “all issues are stuffed with weariness” (Eccles. 1:8); the “days of darkness” (Eccles. 11:8) are many and man dies similar to the beast (Eccles. 3:19). Losses abound as adversity comes many times—oftentimes, by no fault of our personal (Eccles. 7:14).

As we learn by Ecclesiastes, we see that sorrow is symptomatic of what we misplaced in Eden. It isn’t solely a fruit of private sin—it’s additionally what we really feel as we undergo the unavoidable results of authentic sin. This class is essential to participating sorrow correctly. It explains why life is so exhausting to start with and leads us to look to our Redeemer for hope.

Sorrow as a Sign

Whereas sorrow can alert us to sinful attitudes or behaviors, God additionally means for it to function a sign for assist. Contemplate Ecclesiastes 4:1:

And behold, the tears of the oppressed, and so they had nobody to consolation them! On the facet of their oppressors there was energy, and so they had nobody to consolation them.

Right here, the preacher doesn’t condemn the sorrow of the oppressed. (“It isn’t anticipated that oppressions will likely be borne with stoical silence.”[1]) Relatively, he decries the unopposed evil that causes such tears and the unanswered cries for assist! This commentary acknowledges a tragic actuality: the sorrow of the helpless is so typically woefully—wrongfully—ignored.

What do you do whenever you see somebody crying? Does the sight of purple eyes and moist cheeks compel you to marvel, “What’s occurred right here?” If that’s the case, notice that you simply’re being signaled by sorrow—alerted to somebody’s want for consolation and support. On this method, sorrow isn’t solely meant to propel individuals towards repentance. It’s additionally meant to compel believers to “fulfill the legislation of Christ” (Gal. 6:2) by one-another care.

Sorrow as a Season

Maybe probably the most well-known chapter of Ecclesiastes is its third one, the place the preacher poetically contrasts opposing “seasons” in life. He says there’s “a time for each matter underneath heaven…a time to weep, and a time to snicker; a time to mourn, and a time to bop” (Eccles. 3:1, 4). His level is that every one of our occasions—each joyful and unhappy—are appointed by God to perform His functions (Ps. 31:15; 139:16). At occasions, the Lord permits adversity to the touch our lives. At different occasions, He grants blessed reprieve. Right here, sorrow is considered as an acceptable response to explicit occasions—one thing to be anticipated and accepted as a purposeful a part of fallen life (Eccles. 7:2-4).

The place does God’s windfall come into play as you have interaction somebody’s sorrow? Are you attuned to the “occasions” they’re in? Once we view all sorrow as the results of private sin, we danger talking truths out of season—like Job’s mates did (Job 42:7; Prov. 25:20).[2] Failure to acknowledge somebody’s “occasions” can result in cruel counsel, the place sorrow is rebuked moderately than expressed, consoled, and entrusted to God. Because the Man of Sorrows exemplified in His grief, deep disappointment is usually a proper response to horrible wrongs (Isa. 53:3-4; John 11:35).

Responding to Sorrow Correctly

Whereas Ecclesiastes can assist us to know sorrow higher, it additionally helps us to contemplate the way to have interaction elements of it correctly. All through the guide, the preacher typically pairs sorrow with “vexation,” observing that life’s fleeting nature can anger us to the purpose of despair (Eccles. 2:20-21). Surprisingly, it’s this anger that Ecclesiastes 11:10 tells us to place off—not the sorrow we really feel in response to the fallen human situation:

Take away vexation out of your coronary heart, and put away ache out of your physique…”

The preacher’s counsel is immensely sensible: uproot bitterness and have a tendency to your bodily well being. As we take care of sorrowing individuals, we’re clever to place these areas in our ministry focus. The aim isn’t to “delay” disappointment as rapidly as attainable, however to assist sorrowers acknowledge when cynicism and disillusionment have impeded their hope.[3] Right here, the stumbling block to a lifetime of pleasure isnt sorrow. It’s the resentment we harbor over the ache and perplexities of life.

In response to Ecclesiastes, sorrow has worth past the conviction of sin. It additionally features as a instructor who helps us to stay correctly as we quantity our days and do good whereas we are able to (Ps. 90:12; Eccles. 3:9-13). As we have interaction individuals with Christlike care, it may be useful to discover sorrow’s multi-faceted function in sanctification: typically it alerts us to make ethical corrections, whereas different occasions it indicators a necessity for consolation, braveness, and care. Always, the Spirit works by sorrow to deepen our reverence and improve our pleasure within the Lord. Grief forces us to look past this fleeting life for unfading hope (1 Pet. 1:3-4)—to look ahead to the day when our tears will lastly be wiped away (Rev. 21:4).

Questions for Reflection

  1. As you counsel sorrowers, how typically do you refer again to the creation and fall accounts to create perspective concerning the origins of sin and struggling?
  2. How does the knowledge present in Ecclesiastes broaden your view of sorrow and the way to care correctly for it?
  3. What may it seem like so that you can normalize experiences of sorrow in a counseling dialog?

[1] Michael A. Eaton, Ecclesiastes: An Introduction and Commentary, vol. 18, Tyndale Outdated Testomony Commentaries (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1983), 105.

[2] Zack Eswine, Recovering Eden: The Gospel In response to Ecclesiastes (Phillipsburg, NJ: P&R Publishing, 2014), 129.

[3] It’s price noting that for all of the “delay” statements present in Ephesians 4, sorrow isn’t included—however sinful anger/bitterness is repeatedly talked about and warned about.