HomeRelationship5 False Claims about Christian Marriages

5 False Claims about Christian Marriages


5 False Claims about Christian Marriages

Aww, marriage. It is nice, is not it? Are you able to hear the love birds cooing as you gaze into one another’s eyes, clasp each other’s palms, and smile fondly? The wind gently rustles within the sun-filtered treetops alongside a rugged mountainside that captures an awe-inspiring and breathtaking view. Then, it occurs; you each lean in for that tender and oh-so-passionate kiss.

Screeech! Actuality examine. Buddy, you and I each know that as pretty (and fairytale-like) as this picture could also be, marriage (even Christian marriages) is not all sunshine and rainbows. Come to consider it, add a cranky toddler to that scene together with a right away torrential downpour, and that may sound about proper. Ugh! Actual life can put a damper on issues at occasions, am I proper? It may possibly really feel deflating and even defeating, particularly in case you are a hopeless romantic.

Oh, however do take coronary heart. Simply because marriage is not all the time straightforward and stuffed with whimsical moments that take your breath away, that does not imply it may possibly’t be wealthy in love. Sure, which means even at midnight and dismal moments.

Pricey mates, we have to perceive that there’s a lot of knowledge on the market about marriage—particularly Christian marriages. Sadly, the deceiver has his filthy palms in the midst of all of it and is stirring up a lot misguided data. That is as a result of something joined collectively by God is supposed for good and is one thing Devil has each intention and need to interrupt aside and condemn for evil.

So, how can we return to that stunning picture the place we view this sacred relationship with our partner the best way God does? In essence, how can we rise up and battle for our marriages and keep at bay the evil and blatant assaults from the enemy which are so loud and straightforward to bend towards?

Let’s begin by calling out the false claims and issues we imagine we “ought to” have in a Christian marriage. Then let’s enable God to shift our views and never try for a fairy-tale marriage or change into jaded by a hard-hearted relationship however thrive and develop collectively via religion and devotion.

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Couple on couch family conflict discussion arguing

1. Christian Marriages Ought to Be Fulfilling

Have you ever observed how, as a society, now we have virtually pushed apart the fairy story picture and discovered to get acquainted with rather less than stellar model of our marriage? Dare I say even embracing that our marriage simply “is what it’s,” and there’s no model of it getting higher. We have now settled for our unions being cumbersome, stale, and even lifeless.

After we discover that our marriages aren’t fulfilling us mentally, bodily, emotionally, and even spiritually, we type of take a look at. In different phrases, we change into jaded or numb to our companions. Sadly, that is the place contentment, bitterness, and resentment love to cover. That is additionally the darkish place the place the liar sneaks in and whispers how our marriage is falling aside due to the methods our partner is failing to fulfill our wants.

God tells us we should love our partner via service. Ephesians 5:21-33 lays out an exquisite depiction of a loving servanthood in marriage. For those who discover your marriage a bit of lackluster or much less fulfilling than it as soon as was, learn via these verses and elevate your coronary heart to God. Then, invite Him into your union and ask how one can serve your partner in a manner that will likely be extra fulfilling to you each.

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happy couple cooking together in kitchen

2. Christian Marriage Ought to Be Straightforward

The primary yr of our marriage was brutal. I am simply going to go forward and lay that on the market up entrance. I went in with excessive expectations and a hope that since we each cherished God and had been rising in our religion collectively, we’d be set. It could be a straightforward avenue, so to talk.

Boy, was I flawed. I bear in mind our first actual battle and getting so rattled that I drove again to my mother and father’ home in tears. I additionally bear in mind my dad saying marriage takes work, and it is not straightforward. Actually, it was by no means what I needed to listen to.

As you effectively know, marriage is hard. It comes with unexpected challenges that may trigger pressure and produce on a singular sort of heartache. At that time, you get the sense of what “one flesh” seems like when it’s ripped or torn aside throughout arduous occasions.

Because of this Mark 10:9 is commonly learn at weddings, because it brings to gentle a daring reality that each one newlywed {couples} want to listen to and tuck into their hearts. “Due to this fact, what God has joined collectively, let no man separate,” are phrases that we have to converse usually and reclaim over our marriage. God calls us to motion as we do not forget that marriage is not only a horizontal interplay; it permits us to succeed in up and search Him for knowledge, discernment, and steering.

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crying woman holding wedding ring

3. Christian Marriages Ought to Be Divorce-Proof

Oh, how I want this wasn’t the case and that trustworthy {couples} would by no means need to face the devasting penalties that include a divorce. Sadly, simply as many harm individuals are contained in the partitions of a church as they’re outdoors of it. The one distinction is that, as believers, now we have hope past a failed or fractured marriage.

Sadly, we aren’t resistant to the trials, temptations, and sins that may come into a wedding. Two believers are nonetheless stuffed with messy components and go right into a union with wounds and scars that may wreak havoc on a relationship.

The important thing to a wholesome marriage is not simply digging into the Bible, praying over your partner, and “forcing” it to endure. Generally, it is harder than that. Generally, we have to do our personal coronary heart cleaning and guarantee we’re approaching our partner in love somewhat than bitterness. When belief is damaged and occasions have shaken a wedding to its core, we should acknowledge the harm and permit time for God to maneuver within the course of. Whereas we are able to certainly see ripe and sustainable fruit come from a trustworthy partner who’s in prayer, if it is not performed in love, it equates to nothing.

Forgiveness and charm are important and can ultimately free us from guilt, disgrace, regret, or ailing emotions. Nevertheless, we should be motivated by God’s mercy somewhat than our personal inner motives. Whereas there are biblical grounds for divorce (Matthew 5:32), searching for God with a coronary heart posture of affection for our partner will give us the perception we have to attain for hope and therapeutic.

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Upset couple arguing

4. Christian Marriages Ought to Come With out Abuse

Let me first begin by saying that God doesn’t condone violence in any form or kind in a wedding. As His little children, we’re equally cherished, adored, and seen as His priceless treasures. We’re to see our spouses in the exact same manner, honoring and respecting them as a toddler of God. Sadly, dwelling in a damaged and egocentric world, even Christian marriages can get one-sided and change into tempted by sinful pleasures or perform unspeakable actions.

It is vital to know what a Godly marriage appears like. God designed marriage to be joined by two individuals with a view to share companionship and dwell collectively in a wholesome, secure, and affluent manner. A husband is to steer and shield his spouse and kids, whereas a spouse is to nurture and look after her household (1 Corinthians 7:3-5). When these designated roles will not be carried out within the will of God or are seen in a strategy to management or condemn, selfishness is certain to take over, and abuse is more likely to occur.

Nevertheless, simply because a partner is a believer doesn’t suggest they’ll by no means harm their accomplice mentally, emotionally, and even bodily. The gray space right here is when abuse turns into a sample in a wedding, and a accomplice begins to really feel unsafe. That is when outdoors assistance will almost certainly be wanted. Permitting God to offer knowledge and therapeutic is essential whereas praying for avenues to hunt the assist and counsel wanted for each spouses.

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Couple talking sitting having serious conversation

5. Christian Marriages Ought to Resolve Conflicts

If I have never stated it already, no marriage is ideal. Not one! That goes with out saying that each couple, in some unspecified time in the future, will argue. Yep, which means Christian {couples}, too. However the excellent news is that arguments can convey to gentle points that should be addressed or boundaries that should be enforced. This will trigger a wedding to develop a deeper understanding and enhance consciousness of each other’s wants. Basically, combating can generally be good for a wedding. Who knew?

The Bible tells us {that a} tender reply turns away wrath, however a harsh phrase stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1). We’re additionally informed to talk in fact and love (Ephesians 4:15). Moreover, we’re to be humble, light, affected person, and sort to 1 one other (Ephesians 4:2).

On the subject of an argument, many occasions, it is extra about being heard and understood. Positive, there may be an underlying want to only be “proper,” however, all in all, we disagree as a result of there’s a want we wish to be met. After we strategy an argument with the mindset of attempting to know the necessity our partner is attempting to convey, it permits us to melt our hearts whereas listening attentively, talking in love, and lengthening grace as wanted.

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Happy married couple; wives, submit to your husbands.

A Prayer for Your Marriage

Lord, I thank You for the dear present You so graciously gave us in marriage. Please assist us see our partner the best way You do and love them in a manner that honors You. Assist us dismantle all of the lies and misconceptions about marriage and maintain quick to the reality about what You say about marriage. We ask this in Your treasured and holy identify. Amen.

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Alicia SearlAlicia Searl is a devotional creator, blogger, and speaker that’s obsessed with pouring out her coronary heart and pointing girls of all ages again to Jesus. She has an schooling background and grasp’s in literacy.  Her favourite individuals name her Mother, which is why a lot of her time is spent cheering them on at a softball sport or dance class. She is married to her heartthrob (a tall, spiky-haired blond) who can whip up a imply latte. She sips that goodness whereas writing her coronary heart on a web page whereas her pet licks her toes. Go to her web site at aliciasearl.com and join together with her on Instagram and Fb.

Initially printed Thursday, 27 March 2025.